Yesterday Bridget from Sticky Mango Feet came for a visit with her daughter Elia. And yes, I absolutely think of her as Bridget from Sticky Mango Feet.
We had a conversation about blogging, that due to double child interference, didn't get very far. But I thought a lot about it last night.
Adoption blogging is this very interesting phenomenon. I clearly remember the very first adoption-related blog I read. It was Leah's. We met in Ethiopia (she was there visiting Myra, I was there for work.) When we parted Leah handed me a card. I thought it was a business card. And it was, sort of. It was labeled "Noah and Myra's Mom" and had her contact information and blog address. I was confused. (Ahhh, I was so clearly NOT in the adoption loop back then.)
Leah's blog introduced me to other adoption blogs. Which lead to many ugly cries in front of the computer. Which lead to the ordering of a waiting child dvd. Which lead to the walking and talking. Which ultimately lead us to Ariam.
There is something about the blogging community that is impossible to get anywhere else. Maybe it is the semi-anonymity that gives us permission to be very very real. Even ugly if we choose to be. Maybe it is the freedom to add, clarify, delete that makes communicating so much easier. Definitely there is power in writing and sending ourselves out into the universe this way.
The thing Bridget said that I found so interesting was that blogging has a way of making us more mindful of how we approach our adoption. We both agree that it holds us more accountable. You (that vague nebulous 'you' who I hardly know and yet feel so connected to) make me more accountable to A. Because I have to think before I write. And because I have to think before I write, I actually have to think before I act. Think about the way I approach sleep, think about the way I approach community, think about how I talk about adoption, think about how I represent our family. I can more mindfully think through challenges because I can bring them to the community to find support, answers, and ideas.
Maybe most importantly, because I publicly represent certain adoption values on this blog, I actually have to find a way to live them in my work and home life.
It deserves a lot more discussion. (Maybe minus the two adorable distractions!) But my point is simply that blogging is not just a way of documenting each milestone in Ari's development. Blogging for me is accountability, memory, planning, processing, and connection.
That being said. I am asking this: READERS DECLARE YOURSELVES PLEASE!
It's come to the point where I am not sure who is reading here. I have received incredibly kind and supportive comments from new readers on old (very old) posts lately. But often commenters' profiles don't show up in the comments so I have no idea (other than a first name) who you are.
If you read here regularly could you please comment? And if we've never met by email I'd love it if you'd leave your email address or some other identifying link.
I don't use tracking software. I don't know who is reading from Finland or Zimbabwe or New Zealand. If anyone is. I don't use the program that tells me who found this blog and how. I have no idea how long you linger on each page or photo (but I do know that there are programs I could install to find this out!)
I have zero time to faff about (it's a British phrase, possibly spelled incorrectly) with installing these things. I just know that I'm nearing 20,000 hits in one year and would so love to know who is out there with me. Are you reading to see photos (mom- ok I so know that is you), are you reading because you are considering adopting? Are you reading because you are a friend and I don't email you or call you often enough? :) Are you reading because you are interested in the same things I am: ethics, race and identity, sleep crisis, reluctant husbands, vulnerable children, special needs??
If you are Morgan and Jackie then you don't need to comment because I know you are reading to keep tabs on the little light I've been entrusted with.
Thanks in advance everyone!
- Me. Us. She.
- J and I have been married for almost 15 years. We have shared many adventures and a lot of watershed moments. In 2009 I began blogging and in 2010 we adopted our daughter from Ethiopia. In March of 2012 we began the process to adopt a little boy from Haiti. This blog follows the many twists and turns on the road to our two children and beyond.
- ▼ August (8)