tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post836161122538047943..comments2023-05-20T01:43:11.172-07:00Comments on WATERSHED: Adoption and Fostering Update - EditedMe. Us. She.http://www.blogger.com/profile/00222015524829943773noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-88674909929698858082010-02-16T19:24:10.224-08:002010-02-16T19:24:10.224-08:00We were presented with two proposals of available ...We were presented with two proposals of available girls. I immediately like one and Jeff immediately liked the other (Mercy). I tried and tried to convince him that H was the referral we should accept. I prayed, "Lord, change his heart", but in the end the only heart that was changed was mine. I met both of the girls when I was in Ghana and I had no connection what-so-ever with H. When I met her I knew right away Mercy was meant for our family. You will know. I can't wait to see who God has planned for you.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06653626962759853260noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-7928518796749959622010-02-16T17:18:58.997-08:002010-02-16T17:18:58.997-08:00Amanda- the question "Did you just know"...Amanda- the question "Did you just know". NO I didnt'. But I'd questioned and read others- and I'd looked into my own faults enough to know- that i couldn't trust myself. It was a real and honest- question to God? Are you sure? Odd as it sounds I knew I was being entrusted into this boy's hands. He needed me and I needed him. I can't soften that. It was clear to me- but my initial reaction was- ummm- no I think they made a mistake. But I think you read all about it- so you know that already.Sha Zam-https://www.blogger.com/profile/11705917883828933628noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-15679512388073652092010-02-12T10:30:22.937-08:002010-02-12T10:30:22.937-08:00I think that you do KNOW when you see the child...I think that you do KNOW when you see the child's picture at referral...you know whether this is your child or not. I knew with Macy that she was my daughter. I have had friends that got referrals and they knew that the child was not meant to be theirs...so they passed on the referral, later to get a referral that they KNEW was their child. And it's pretty incredible to see those children that were passed by one family, be met with the perfect family for them just a short time later. It's amazing and hard and wonderful.Eastiopianshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13080708384309438314noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-27492713064220699622010-02-11T17:35:26.188-08:002010-02-11T17:35:26.188-08:00I agree with Jill about seeing the referral pictur...I agree with Jill about seeing the referral picture...we had waited so long that we were over the moon to finally see ANY picture!!! We got tons of pics and videos from traveling families, but it was SO hard to fall in love with a picture....However, once we met Ru, we knew she was meant to be our girl!Missyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08476275508300919737noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-84709752385951369772010-02-11T17:25:10.987-08:002010-02-11T17:25:10.987-08:00You know you don't get to pick your child when...You know you don't get to pick your child when you give birth. They hand you a slimy pink or brown or reddish or whatever colored bundle and you are instantly in love. You don't have any idea what this little thing is going to grow into, but you know you will love it no matter what. I felt the same way when I saw my adopted children. We looked at several files for waiting children with Nesradine,and we knew he was the one for us. We shed some tears over one that we chose not to adopt, but God had the perfect home for him too. <br /><br />My advice for you is don't stress about it. Wait in hope, not fear. Enjoy where you are now, accept that this is all out of your control, and that it is happening exactly the way it should. Bureacracy makes no sense, and is very frustrating, because they are trying to untangle knots in a very impersonal way. Waiting is very difficult, but the end of it is worth every minute.Signehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03919591399945521649noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-59054946283889633082010-02-11T13:23:35.200-08:002010-02-11T13:23:35.200-08:00To answer your question...I cried obviously when I...To answer your question...I cried obviously when I saw Kiya's referral picture and I just got all warm and fuzzy. That said the mother/daughter bond did take time. I wanted nothing more than the be a mom and I loved my little girl from day one but I think that is different than being in love with her. That took a little longer...does that even make sense? <br /><br />There are so many unknowns in the world of adoption and the best advice I can give you is to trust yourself. Deep down your child, the right child will find you. You will know somewhere deep inside which child should be your family.Cathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01084657375579840418noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-36027165824289852862010-02-11T12:45:37.330-08:002010-02-11T12:45:37.330-08:00Ah, I think I see a problem: "but the world d...Ah, I think I see a problem: "but the world does not want to give me any to take care of." You are creating your own reality. When you believe "My child is coming home!" - that's when it will happen.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-71298279164775079662010-02-11T12:31:30.052-08:002010-02-11T12:31:30.052-08:00I realize that I totally did not answer your quest...I realize that I totally did not answer your question :) - but what I mean is that just because you don't hear triumphant music playing and see shooting starts when you see your child for the first time, doesn't mean anything. Go with your heart but make sure your heart is not being ruled by your brain!Jillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03058664383204901514noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-15020729734884618512010-02-11T12:28:16.625-08:002010-02-11T12:28:16.625-08:00To answer your question....I loved my picture of M...To answer your question....I loved my picture of Mari but I would have loved any picture of any kid at that point. I think it's different for everyone. I just saw a picture of a friend's referral and instantly KNEW that the child was the perfect fit for my friend.<br /><br />Also, I didn't feel that instant "click" when I first met Mari either. There are so many factors that influence this...for me, I had built up a wall because I didn't want to be devastated if things did not work out...I totally guarded my heart from feeling anything.<br />I wrote more about it here...http://jillsexp.blogspot.com/2008/11/not-all-sunshine-and-rainbows.html<br /><br />Luckily, someone's beautiful smile and sweet disposition totally broke down that wall! I can't imagine my life with anyone different than my daughter. We are a perfect fit for each other because we work to be perfect for each other. (Does that make any sense?)<br /><br />So open your heart, you are already attached to a referral just by your hopes...don't guard your heart.Jillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03058664383204901514noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-51109068932445209872010-02-11T11:43:43.666-08:002010-02-11T11:43:43.666-08:00I think it does Korana! Geesh. But I also know the...I think it does Korana! Geesh. But I also know there are things they teach in foster training that aren't in adoption training. So I guess I can see some value. Not 16 hours worth of value. Maybe 2-4 hours worth?Me. Us. She.https://www.blogger.com/profile/00222015524829943773noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-76344001285654845542010-02-11T11:35:49.751-08:002010-02-11T11:35:49.751-08:00Does that mean the state thinks you are ok to adop...Does that mean the state thinks you are ok to adopt, but not to foster? Now that is silly and ridiculous. Perfect example of no-common-sense regulations. But I hope for you to find peace, soon. A picture and peace. It can't be long now.Koranahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05862817352553041987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9077471860024761518.post-5102597614433113802010-02-11T10:52:32.501-08:002010-02-11T10:52:32.501-08:00Hang in there. Dreams do come true just not on our...Hang in there. Dreams do come true just not on our timelines. Sending big hugs!Cathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01084657375579840418noreply@blogger.com